BACK in the 90’s a trend exploded where women started collecting miniature shoes. They were scaled quarter sized replicas of high heels and flats. Most that I saw appeared to be injection molded. They were sold along with tiered display shelves and seemed just the right thing for a stay-at-home wife to waste her husband’s money on.

At the time I remember thinking, “Why in the fuck do you want a replica shoe; why not just buy an actual pair of shoes and wear them?” It just made no goddamned sense to me.

Soon, they started appearing in dollar stores as grotesque and poorly executed caricatures of the original miniature shoes. Sound famiar?

As the Internet was in its AOL infancy, I don’t think there was a big collector market and so assume at some point these things got boxed up and put in the attic next to the glass blown French poodle vases and giant wooden forks and spoons.

Miniature furniture soon followed. And to be honest, this made a bit more sense to me as these were icons of mid-century modern designs; like the Eames lounge and Noguchi coffee table in 1/3 scale. At least these were specific, identifiable things. Are there really iconic shoes?

ENTER 2013 and the brilliant minds at Invicta Watch Company and their soon to launch line of miniature watches:

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Yep.

Miniature watches.

The model that they are based on is the “Venom” which has a bunch of snake cues. I’m sure these will look bitchin’ staged next to the “pure oriental” Ninja sword sets of a Katana, Wakizashi and Tanto that Watchgeeks long ago bought from the late night, infomercial-as-homeshopping channel Frost Cutlery dicks.

But these may be purely functional for some. Seeing that so many Invicta fans have such chunky wrists, they seem to weigh in well over 400 lbs. These would be perfect rings on such a ham hand. If they are going to have to cut the wall out of your bedroom to get you to the hospital, you should be swagged out.

These would also be a great first watch for an infant. One would look hard as hell on a chubby newborns wrist; complemented by an Italian horn charm necklace. And how goddamned cute would it be if daddy and baby had matching Venoms?

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Daddy Wrong Legs

January 24, 2012

THERE is no possible way I could not share this immediately. I mean, I thought about saving it for later in the week but if it’s real, and with Invicta you just never know, then it’s just too goddamn funny to sit on.

I received a mail from someone claiming to be an “insider” of a sourcing firm that works with Invicta on their various apparel items.

The belt fuckel below is supposedly a piece for a yet unnamed collection that will also including chain wallets. And chain belts.

For men.

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It measures a whopping 17 centimeters across. No details on the weight, other than “hefty”. I attempted to get more answers and pics of more funny ass designs. My request has gone unanswered.

ACCORDING to the source, this thing will possibly see the light of day in the third or fourth quarter of this year.

Merry Christmas minions!

EVEN though Jim Skelton has been reduced to “hosting” a Ustream show, he still feels the need to lash out at Tim Temple. Posted on Watchgeeks was a thread entitled Presentation Skills Advice for All TV Hosts wherein the poster questions the behavior of TV presenters that fawn all over the product as disingenuous.

Moby Dickweed surfaces to add his two cents to the discussion. And what he states is revealing on several levels:

You can ask Michael.. I kiss no one’s butt, and I’ll be brutally honest about the products that I am asked to sell. If I lose the inter-office battle to air an item (again.. I no longer have to battle about this these days), I have been known to even go as far as to mock the product on the show. Of course that is an EXTREME case (remember the faux chrono?? Remember when they tried to slip one single Stauer into my show???).

Skelton seems to be stating that he was trying to exercise more control over what product aired. This was reportedly the same mistake that Temple supposedly made which ultimately led to his dismissal. This would seemingly contradict Skelton’s initial statements that the breakup was mutual – something that anyone with a brain in their head knows was not true. But one has to wonder if his behavior on WG and taking of fights to the SNBC airwaves; his alleged misuse of personal information and his other on air antics and statements didn’t lea to his demise. Maybe it all came down to arguing over product.

His next statement of “have(ing) been known to even go as far as to mock the product on the show” probably didn’t put him in the good graces of management. It also seems to suggest that if he was bold enough to “mock the product” that when news of Temple’s return to SNBC became public that his erratic behavior that I detailed and was attacked for was surely his “mocking” of the network brass.

I am also surprised that Michael Davis would allow Skelton to dismiss Stauer considering Invicta shares airtime with the brand. It’s funny, I don’t disagree that Stauer is a real stretch, yet Skelton ignoring the fact that he was there to sell seem to be what got him tossed out. Temple gets it and that’s why he has his job back.

And it’s why Skelton is on Ustream.

IT has been widely speculated that Jim Skelton has some connection to the Imperious watch brand which, after many denials, was revealed to be a trademark of Invicta.

Part of what fueled the Skelton / Imperious connection were comments by Skelton himself regarding his design of watches, as well as his constant admonishment of people wanting to know who designed such ground breaking pieces as the X-Wing and Jailbreak. I remember him finally getting fed up with people hinting at his involvement on WGs and he said something to the affect of “…do you know who the designer of the Speedway? Does it matter?”

NOW after fire sales at ShopNBC, the only source for this brand that was going to “dominate it’s class”, and a very interesting post on Jim Skelton’s Facebook page from a May 24th inquiry regarding new models and the very future of Imperious.

Jim’s response:
“I don’t know how much longer you’ll see them. Last I knew, there was still new product in production, and production on these takes about 3-6 months due to the complexity, so I’d assume you’ll see one or mayyyybe two more rounds of them. What Shop will do now with recent changes though, I cannot predict. There were still one or two brand new models due out plus new variations of the current models (one for example was an automatic 3 hand X-Wing)”

Another posters asks if Skelton believes that the “brand” is going to fold.

Jim Skelton responded “I don’t think “fold” is the right word, but it is possible that they might stop offering them.”

Hmm. It is widely believed that Skelton has some skin in the Invicperious game. ShopNBC fires him and now they are not going to offer any new models and ShopNBC is systematically blowing them out.

Draw your own conclusions.

Jim Skelton Leaves Watchgeeks

February 22, 2011

“As you know, Michael, Bruce and myself have transferred ownership of watchgeeks.net over to Invicta. At the same time, I am leaving the forum. As we continue to build the watch shows at ShopNBC, I need to focus more of my time and energy there. I am also working on spending more quality time with my own family, and not be tethered to a computer all the time this has been in the works for a while now, and I felt it needed to be done. I have been blessed with two great partners who agreed and worked with me on this transition. Thanks also to Eyal and Invicta for picking up the baton and carrying WG forward with grace.

I am always here for you however, and you can feel free to always contact me via email or on my two Facebook pages.

I cannot begin to thank all of you enough for your amazing support, both of me personally at ShopNBC and also for your support of watchgeeks. We have not only watched this forum grow, but more importantly we have watched our membership grow closer as a family. Many of you have made lifelong friendships, and the community here goes far beyond a typical watch forum on the Internet. I am forever grateful for all you have done here to create this community, and I know that Invicta plans to grow the forum in so many ways, without changing anything that you love about it.

You guys made it happen, and I know I speak for Bruce and Michael when I say THANK YOU for all that you’ve done, and I am excited to see what the future holds for this community.

If anyone needs to contact me, or just wants to keep in touch, I’m not disappearing… you can reach me via email at jskelton@shopnbc.com or on my Facebook page:
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Jim-Sk…03476923063566

Thank you all so much, it has been my greatest pleasure getting to know all of you. Don’t be strangers…”

IS Comcast owned ShopNBC trying to distance themselves from Invicta? Or is Jim Skelton giving up WGs and the site a requirement to let him out of a non-compete?